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    6/19/2009

    不顺心

     
    最近听到周围朋友的抱怨越来越多, 让我觉得生活其实本来就不应该是个"如意顺心"的东西, 所谓的开心只不过是自己的自我解嘲而已! sigh ....哎, 有的人想走, 有的人想留却留不下...还有些人不满意现状想要改变可无能为力的, 也有些是穷折腾! 而我呢??? 最近也因为遇到了一些特别特别没有sense的无赖而处在气愤中! 人和人为什么差别那么大呢? 说真的, 谁能告诉告诉我啊? 我就不明白了, 还是我太不成熟了这些问题都还不到能想明白的阶段呢? 能40了就开始不惑了吧! 我靠.. 如果这么下去还不知道能不能活到40了呢... 还是自己try to find the answer吧!
     
    有些人活着但是他却已经死了... 有些鸟人还活着干嘛啊? 烦人烦已的, 给别人的生活带来了无尽的痛苦, "real fucker"!!! 我天不怕地不怕最怕就是遇到无赖了, 还寸了, 无赖就让我遇到了! How lucky!!!!我觉得自己的忍耐力越来越不行了 ... 根本就是ZERO!!!昨天我就没有忍, 嗷嗷一顿发火可是还是没有解气啊, 能让我打他一顿吗??? 一顿抱头猛击!!!!如果杀人不犯法我就杀了他----"为民除害"!!!!!!!! 
     
    鸟人, 如果再来惹我, 我就只能不忍了!!!
     
    说点开心的事儿吧, 今天难得的听了言承旭的最新专辑, aiya, 进步了很多啊! 真好, 声音和技巧都成熟多了, 突然找到了他的第一本专辑, 怀念自己一个人躲在屋里听歌的日子哈.. 无聊但值得怀念啊!
     
    You are my only persistence! 真好!!!
     
     
     
     
    6/16/2009

    Back at ONE

     
    朋友的一篇blog说的真好, 他说, "好久没有blog了, 每天都是忙乎着在开心网上种菜, 偷菜, 赛车.... 再次来到自己的blog还是觉得这里最亲切, 最舒服, 让我有一个地方能够倾诉和依靠...." 说的真对!!! 我虽然不种菜偷菜可是自己也觉得变懒了, 是因为大家都去了开心网了吗? 所以每天自己也一定要去那里报到吗? ..... hmmm....不知道,可是我也这么觉得这里才是最能放下心情的地方.... 习惯了吧可能! 决定回到从前!
     
    很开心昨天晚上见到了一个很久没有看到的好朋友...其实朋友真的不需要多, 有那么一个就觉得自己是很幸福的很幸福的了! 嘿嘿... 加油哈 小宁!!!! 哎呦 .. 一起一起哈....
    6/11/2009

    送别罗京

     
    我挺喜欢罗京的, 虽然我基本上不看<<新闻联播>>.
     
    读了所有罗京病后的报道, 中间不知道哭了几次, 被他的坚强和乐观深深地感动着....还有就是罗京所经历的这些让我情不自禁地想起了我自己曾经亲身陪伴过的一位朋友....也是10个月的时间.... 所以我感同身受!! 眼泪止不住的往下流 ....2006年的9月让我刻骨铭心, 那也是我从小到大第一次参加追悼会, 第一次感受到"失去" ... 第一次的送别... 跟罗京一样, 朋友也是一个顶天立地的爷们, 打心眼里对你好的人 .... 可是就是不守信用!!!! 说好了病好之后一起去海南的, 可是住进去以后就没有再出来过.  我每天去看朋友, "肝癌晚期"清楚的告诉我他剩下的日子不多了, 所有晚期可能出现的并发症都发生了, 朋友不知道进进出出手术室多少次了, 最后一次进手术室的时候他明确的告诉医生:"不要给我打麻药了" .... 在场的人都哭了, 因为我们知道病本身的疼痛远远超出了伤口的疼痛 .... 麻药早就在治疗的初期就已经失去了作用, 朋友坚持要自己亲自走进手术室 ... 一步一步刻在了每一个人的心里. 我每次就只扶着他走到电梯口,然后他就要求自己走进病房 .... 起初不知道为什么, 后来朋友说这是为了让其他的病友还有生的希望.... 肃然起敬!
     
    这10个月里, 我从来没有看过朋友哭 ... 几次进进出出抢救室... 重症室 .... 病危通知... 他永远都是把自己最最最坚强的一面留给我们. 其实说实话, 那段时间我每次去医院, 每次坐上电梯, 每次去那个楼层我都心虚, 我都害怕, 我连看到墙上的那几个字"肿瘤"我都一直冒冷汗, 我们都怕有一天一走进病房, 床是空的了 .... 所以每次去之前,我都会打个电话. 后来, 朋友只能靠点滴过活了, 各种为他续命的药 ... 再后来朋友时而清醒时而昏迷时而危机时而平稳.... 最后一次我离开医院的时候他是清醒的, 我握着他的手在他耳边说: 加油啊!!! 他看着我的眼睛虽然已经不能说话却使劲的握了我的手一下, 这一下让我没有忍住自己的眼泪... 我转过身大声的说: "我明天下班来看你啊!!!!!" 这一下没想到竟成了永别......第二天下午我接到了电话说 ----- 朋友, 走了! 我坐在位置上哭了不知道有多久,  沉默了很久很久....
     
    "活着" 成了朋友唯一的奢望 ... 那10个月我们每个人都很痛! "能活着真好 ..." 他说.
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    6/8/2009

    Who hears the voice within yourself?

     

    **Who hears the voice within yourself? **

     

    Should you find yourself
    At a loss and pondering,
    What is life all about
    And what is my purpose? ...
    Be thankful!
    There are those who didn't live
    Long enough to get the opportunity.

    Should you notice
    A new gray hair in the mirror ...
    Think of the cancer patient
    In chemo-therapy
    Who wishes she had hair to examine.

    Should you find it hard
    To get to sleep tonight ...
    Just remember the homeless family
    Who has no bed to lie in.

    Remember that someone else today ...
    Could be one of us tomorrow!

    We have taller buildings ... but shorter tempers;
    Wider freeways ... but narrower viewpoints.
    We spend more ... but have less;
    We buy more ... but enjoy it less.
    We have bigger houses ... but smaller families;
    More conveniences ... but less time;

    We have more degrees ... but less sense;
    More knowledge ... but less judgment;
    More experts ... but more problems;
    More medicine ... but less wellness.

     

    We drink too much,
    Smoke too much,
    Spend too recklessly,
    Laugh too little,
    Drive too fast,
    Get angry too quickly,
    Stay up too late,
    Get up too tired,
    Read too seldom,
    Watch TV too much,
    And pray too seldom.

    We have multiplied our possessions ...
    But reduced our values.
    We talk too much, love too seldom ...
    And hate too often.

    We've learned how to make a living ...
    But not a life.
    We've added years to life ...
    But not life to years.

    We've conquered outer space ...
    But not inner space.
    We've done larger things ...
    But not better things.

    We've cleaned up the air ...
    But polluted the soul.
    We've split the atom ...
    But not our prejudice.

    We write more ...
    But learn less.
    We plan more ...
    But accomplish less.
    We've learned to rush ...
    But not to wait.

     

    We have higher incomes ...
    But lower morals.
    We have more food ... but less appeasement;
    More acquaintances ... but fewer friends;
    More effort ... but less success.

    We build more computers to hold more information,
    To produce more copies than ever ...
    But have less communication.
    We've become long on quantity ...
    But short on quality.

    These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion;
    Tall men, and short character;
    Steep profits, and shallow relationships.

    These are the times of world peace ...
    But domestic warfare.
    More leisure ... and less fun;
    More kinds of food ... but less nutrition.
    These are days of two incomes ... but more divorce;
    Of fancier houses ... but broken homes.

    These are days of quick trips,
    Disposable diapers,
    Throwaway morality,
    One-night stands,
    Overweight bodies,
    And pills that do everything ...
    From cheer ...
    To quiet ...
    To kill.

    It is a time when there is much in the show window ...
    And nothing in the stockroom.

    Indeed it's all true. Think about it!!!!!